It is always interesting to pay attention to what the world finds particularly noxious about the Christian faith. Over the last 10 years the bone of contention has clearly been our approach to sexual ethics. The world HATES what we believe about marriage. The world scoffs in open-mouthed amazement at what we believe about gender; what we believe about homosexuality is considered borderline illegal; what we believe about sex in general is deemed antiquated, boring, bigoted and irrelevant in equal measure. The agitation in culture with our intransigence on these issues has become almost comical but it appears that it might soon be overshadowed by a new and more foundational offense. The world is starting to notice what we believe about grace, and Christian be warned, the masses are not amused.
The internet world has been abuzz for weeks now with the story of several admitted cases of sexual molestation having been committed by a member of the Duggar family featured on the reality TV show known as “19 Kids And Counting”. According to published reports, one of the grown sons on the show admitted to his parents and to the police that he had sexually molested a number of young girls when he was a teenager, now more than 15 years ago. No charges were filed, because the events confessed were several years in the past, and the individual in question was not charged as a sex offender because he was too young to be so considered in the eyes of the law. The young man apparently made a legitimate effort to apologize and to reconcile with the victims and no one disputes the fact that he seems to have been granted their forgiveness. Those are the facts of this scandal, as far as they have been reported.
Now let us be clear that sexual molestation is a sin and a crime of the highest magnitude. Let us be clear also that when sexual molestation happens in a family or in a church, it should be reported to the police and the individual in question should submit to any and all forms of punishment and rehabilitation required and administered by the state. The church must never take to herself privileges and responsibilities given by God to the government. The Bible says:
1 Let every person be subject to the governing authorities. For there is no authority except from God, and those that exist have been instituted by God. 2 Therefore whoever resists the authorities resists what God has appointed, and those who resist will incur judgment. 3 For rulers are not a terror to good conduct, but to bad. Would you have no fear of the one who is in authority? Then do what is good, and you will receive his approval, 4 for he is God’s servant for your good. But if you do wrong, be afraid, for he does not bear the sword in vain. For he is the servant of God, an avenger who carries out God’s wrath on the wrongdoer. 5 Therefore one must be in subjection, not only to avoid God’s wrath but also for the sake of conscience. 6 For because of this you also pay taxes, for the authorities are ministers of God, attending to this very thing. 7 Pay to all what is owed to them: taxes to whom taxes are owed, revenue to whom revenue is owed, respect to whom respect is owed, honor to whom honor is owed. (Romans 13:1–7 ESV)
Government is God’s servant for the avenging of evil and the maintenance of good. Any church that shelters an abuser from the scrutiny and censure of government deserves whatever scorn, ridicule and revulsion she receives. If the Duggar family sheltered this young man or lied about his crimes, then let them face whatever fallout may come. If the police failed to report these crimes or to prosecute what should have been prosecuted then let there be an inquiry and let there by outcry until justice is done. But, that doesn’t seem to be the nature of this particular scandal. There isn’t a lot of steam to the argument that a legal case should have been pursued. The young man was a minor at the time and in many states south of the border sexual acts between minors cannot be considered illegal, even if they warrant reporting. Therefore, the lack of criminal prosecution does not appear to be the issue. What seems to have people upset is that life, eventually, went on. After horrible, horrible events and after much soul wrenching and heart breaking disclosure and apology and process and restitution, it seems, that in the end, the girls in question forgave, the young man grew up and the matter was eventually closed. THAT – that horrible, intolerable story of GRACE, FORGIVENESS and CHANGE offends and outrages our culture. Our culture demands its pound of flesh. Our culture feels righteous when it is burning others in effigy. Our culture doesn’t believe anymore that people can change.
The second story in this emerging conversation about grace arises out of recent events at The Village Church in Dallas, Texas. The story there is even more disturbing, if possible, than the one involving Josh Duggar. About a week ago the news broke that The Village Church had placed a woman under discipline for attempting to annul her marriage after learning that her husband had an addiction to child pornography. She had signed a membership covenant at the church stating that she would not pursue divorce until she had secured the agreement of her elders that such a divorce was Biblically warranted. The Village Church did not say in its statements that divorce would have been inappropriate in this case, but rather said that her pursuit of divorce before engaging a church process of reconciliation under the supervision of the eldership placed her under automatic church discipline. Now, again, let us not be accused of diminishing the horror of the offenses that are being alleged in this case. A person has admitted to viewing child pornography. That is a sin and a crime and it should be punished to the full extent of the law. It should be reported and prosecuted and all indications are that it was. The individual has been interviewed and investigated by the FBI, everyone appears to be cooperating fully with the proper authorities. That isn’t the focus of this scandal.
Let us also agree that The Village Church may, in fact, have been unnecessarily wooden in their application of their own policies with regards to what places a person under church discipline. Process should be prepared to bend in response to facts on the ground. That may not have happened in this case and The Village Church issued an apology to that effect earlier this week. They did not apologize for holding a high view of marriage. They did not apologize for believing that in general, marriages can recover from most forms of sexual sin and immorality. They did not even apologize for practicing church discipline; they did however apologize for being mechanical and wooden and unloving in the way that they executed their process in this particular case. That apology, while admirable, is not having the effect they intended.
The attacks on The Village Church have been blistering. The titles of the articles leave us in no doubt about the sympathy of the reporters. One article making the rounds yesterday ran under the heading: Megachurch: Stay With Your Kiddie-Porn Watching Husband Or Face Discipline. The article itself demonstrates as little objectivity as the title prepares you to expect. The outrage here seems to share a common root with that directed at Josh Duggar. The Village Church’s belief that this marriage might have conceivably been restored is being viewed as evidence of a failed theology of patriarchy. The belief that the wife may have been able, with help and counsel and extensive intervention to forgive her husband is being viewed as dangerously naïve and culpably insensitive to the safety of women, not to mention the safety of the children to whom he might pose further risk. Furthermore, the belief that this individual himself might one day be rehabilitated and restored to Gospel fellowship within the church is being met with apoplectic shock and incomprehension. The church itself is straining under the pressure of this cultural onslaught. Christianity Today released a summary of the events thus far, quoting liberally from emails and press releases made by lead pastor Matt Chandler:
“The church also immediately places restrictions on anyone accused of being a danger to children. Those restrictions including banning them from children’s ministry or any meetings where children are present. Anyone accused of abuse must sign in with church staff, and be chaperoned at all times. Those restrictions remain in place “forever,” even if the person is not charged with a crime, said Chandler. Even though church leaders have not always immediately informed the congregation of allegations of abuse, they have informed all the staff, including church security personnel, Chandler said.
The Village Church wants to extend the “scandalous grace” of the gospel to anyone who repents, even those that society deems unworthy of forgiveness, he said.
But Chandler said the church does not compromise when it comes to child safety.
“We come down fast and hard when allegations are made,” he said.”[1]
My purpose is not to be critical of Matt Chandler or The Village Church. I have no idea what I would say if a microphone was put in my face and I was asked to comment on a situation this sad, this complicated and this sinful. A lot of what they did seems right, appropriate and remarkably similar to what we would have done had these horrible events occurred in our church rather than in theirs. Church members are expected to include the elders in the discussion about the potential termination of a marriage – that’s what membership means! No one is forced to become a member; it is a voluntary request for and submission to a process of community accountability. To be clear, I have no concerns about their ecclesiology and no concern with what they believe about marriage, divorce or church discipline. I agree with their own assessment of the conduct in this matter as being too mechanical and unresponsive but I have no issue with the basic principles underlying their approach. My concern is with some of the things the pastor said, under pressure, probably without forethought, about the scandal of grace he declared himself eager to defend:
“Those restrictions remain in place forever”, said Chandler.
Do they really? Do restrictions on our life and ministry within the body of Christ remain in place FOREVER? That is beyond even what the secular courts would recommend for similar offenses. Many states stipulate a maximum prison sentence of 2-3 years followed by a maximum of 8 years restricted access and probation for these offenses – is the church to hold to a standard of punishment unknown even in the secular arena? Are we ideologically closed to the idea that a person might be transformed by the Gospel and eventually liberated from the sin to which they were formerly enslaved? Do we still believe in a Gospel that frees us from the penalty AND the power of wickedness and sin?
“We come down fast and hard when allegations are made”, the pastor said.
Do we really? What happened to the testimony of 2-3 witnesses? The Bible says:
Every charge must be established by the evidence of two or three witnesses. (2 Corinthians 13:1 ESV)
Even the secular courts insist that people be treated as innocent until proven guilty; are we to impress the world with our high standards of response at the expense of grace and truth?
Let me be very clear, at our church we abide by the law of the land that dictates that any allegation of abuse be immediately reported to the appropriate authorities. I’ve made those phone calls. I’m not arguing with the protocol here but I am concerned about the tone and what that tone reveals about our preparedness to answer for the scandal of the Gospel. “We come down hard and fast when allegations are made”. I hope that means “we respond immediately to all allegations and report those to the appropriate authorities”. I hope it implies also coming down saddened, broken and determined to get to the bottom of things. I hope “those restrictions remain in place forever” means “if an allegation is proven true we put immediate restrictions on that person’s activity and access in accordance with every and all court mandates censures and probations”. I hope it implies that we do in fact still believe that people can change and while we want to be wise and prudent, we do believe in transformed hearts and transformed people. If it doesn’t mean that, then why are we even here? If the Gospel can’t change people, then we above all people are most to be pitied.
There is a part of me that wants to be with the crowd on this one. My wife and I did foster care for 9 years. We’ve looked sexual abuse in the face. I hate it. I’ve seen what it does to kids. But I’ve also looked grace in the face and I love it. I guess I just want to believe that we can follow the rules, report all abuse, affirm all government sanction, fence all vulnerable people from potential sources of harm and STILL BELIEVE in a God who forgives and fixes broken men and women. I don’t want to give that up just to appease an angry culture. I want to believe in justice AND in grace. I want to believe in the Gospel.
I hope this isn’t heard by anyone as being critical of The Village Church or Matt Chandler (whether its heard as critical of the TLC network means much less to me). I’m writing this article just a few hours after attending one of their Dallas area campuses for worship and everything I saw there seemed to indicate that this is a healthy group that loves Jesus, treasures his Word and tries to live out Christ’s mandate among the nations. They seem like a real good church – they seem like our church. But this whole encounter serves to remind all those good churches out there – Matt’s, mine and probably yours – that we need to be prepared to answer for the scandal of grace. The world is done being bored with us. Now they are suspicious, and as they learn more about what we believe, they are getting angry. We need to be prepared to answer for the things that we believe and that is going to require a lot more prayer and preparation than it used to.
Every time we face the anger and censure of a disbelieving culture we have a choice to make. We can whisper, we can edit or we can stand. I want to stand on this one. I want to stand on grace. I want to believe that people can change. I know that not everyone will. I know that some people will track for a while and then like ground that soaks up the rain they will fall back, fall away and ultimately perish in their sin. But I believe that if people are really saved, if they truly repent and are really filled with the Holy Spirit then they will change, they will grow by one degree of glory to the next into the same image as Jesus Christ. This is a promise of Scripture (2 Corinthians 3:18) and this is the work of Spirit in me and in everyone who believes. That’s the Gospel and here I stand, I can do no other, so help me God. Amen.
SDG
Paul Carter
[1] http://www.christianitytoday.com/ct/2015/may-web-only/matt-chandler-apologizes-for-village-churchs-decision-to-di.html